just sitting here crying after watching teuk’s thank you speech for best album 

i don’t cry over anything much. not tragic movies or soulful music or heartwrenching books

i’m known for not crying over anything, actually

but when is see my nine boys up there on stage, with tears in their eyes, i can’t stop myself

would you believe it that suju is the only thing that’s made me cry happy tears in my life? 

that’s how much these men mean to me. 

i may sound like a stupid teenager. my parents may despair of me. my friends might not get it. 

even i can’t explain it fully. 

but when i see them working to the bone, staying up late, overtaxing themselves, all for this dream they have, of being the best, for all the thousands of fans they love, it gives me something nothing else has. they inspire me. they make me happy. they give me faith. 

and no matter what happens, i can say this with absolute certainty

my blood runs pearl sapphire blue

ishn’t he lovery~ or why i love cho kyuhyun 

cho kyuhyun. do you know what you do to me? can you possibly have any inkling of the emotions you inspire in me? 

how everytime i see your face, my face breaks out into a smile? i can’t even control it, honestly. i’m smiling while writing this because i just watched your ss4 solo and 

cho kyuhyun, i love you 

you were sitting there at the piano, and i knew it would be good, with your spider hands on the keyboard, showing off your skills…and then you started singing and i melted into my bedsheets. 

you said something in korean i couldn’t understand, but i squealed anyway just because you were there and being adorable and then you started that beat on the piano and your

caramel macchiato velvet chocolate silky smooth orgasm inducing

voice and i swear to shisus i screamed along with everyone in the audience in the video. 

and i’m not saying anything was less-than-heaven-breaking about your voice yesterday, but then you 

PULLED OUT A FRICKING HARMONICA

and i’m pretty sure i just died right there on my bed. 

and then

YOU PLAYED IT LIVE

because you are kyuhyun, of course you can play a harmonica in between the keyboard and singing, and of course you can do all that live! we are fools for expecting anything less. 

and then with your molten lava tone, you proceeded to show the world why you are cho kyuhyun, evil and adorable magnae of super junior, with the warm, captivating voice. and i just sat there laughing in joy and smiling and quietly melting into a puddle. 

and that’s why i absolutely, positively, irrevocably am in love with you.  

to be honest, i wasn’t sure if i should write anything for geng…although he was a suju member for at least 4 years, the fact can’t be denied that he isn’t anymore. 

but then i thought that han geng contributed just as much to this anniversary as the other members. he fought and bled and struggled with the rest of them, and he also laughed and cried and hugged and loved his members just as much. 

our beijing fried rice, cook, china umma, and grumpy landlord. suju’s lord of china’s 18 million minority dances. the one who had a charming problem with korean. whose body could flex anyway it wanted and still make the girls scream. this man loves his mother so much he bought her a dumpling shop (two of them!) and even when he couldn’t see her, he probably called her every two days. he would cook for his members even when they were being bratty. 

he loved heechul for everything he was, and stayed by his side as long as possible. he glued heechul and siwon together, and made them the unstoppable trio. he supported his leader whenever he could, and then became a leader himself. he took every burden, every hospital stay, every unfair payment, every backbreaking schedule, for his brothers. 

some might think that han geng doesn’t deserve a mention on this year’s anniversary. but i’d rather think that with geng, the group had the foundation it needed to carry on after the lawsuit. i think that his leaving made the all of them stronger. i know that they still love each other. i know that they’ll reunite one day. but until then, thank you geng, for all that you have given suju. keep being our shining star, ok?

evil overlord, heenim, lady heehee, cinderella, heerobbong, flower: all these nicknames are for suju’s resident catlady. he talks without reserve, speaks his mind regardless of what others thinks, and crossdresses on stage. he’s flamboyant, loud, and crazy, but he’s also quiet, insightful, and loving. his love for his dongsaengs and hyung is legendary. after every insult, he’ll say why he loves that member so. famous for his skill in variety, our princess is now in the army, where he’s getting full marks as usual. we’ll wait for our lord heenim no matter how long it seems, and show him that he is never forgotten. 

our precious leader-sshi, ducky, super hyung, umma teuk, angel without wings. the one who holds 14 boys’ hearts in one hand and countless more fans’ hearts in the other. who keeps his brothers safe even when they’re away, and does everything to make sure they’re happy. who always bows at 90 degrees and never forgets to thank anyone. our leader, leeteuk, park jungsu.